How to get back with your ex girlfriend tip #1: Stay strong as a man. This means that you should not call her, text her, write her long winded handwritten notes sent by pigeon, etc. You can have your grieving process, but don’t leave your grieving on her answering machine. What I’m saying is you need to move on with your life as a man. There’s nothing more unattractive than having a man emotionally crushed, and doing everything to get a woman’s attention. That reeks of desperation, and it has never worked well. Stop the neediness. Leave that shit for the other 90% of the male population that have trouble getting laid.

How to get back with your ex girlfriend tip #2: Examine the breakup. Who broke up with who? What was the reason for the breakup. If you broke up with the girl because of her character flaw (i.e. she leaves the toilet seat down in your house), then you need to realize that you will not be able to change her. If you don’t like the girl’s personality, you’re SOL (that stands for “shit out of luck” for my foreign readers), so just go find another girl. If you broke up because of a specific situation that arose, then you might be in the clear—a second chance might still work out.

How to get back with your ex girlfriend tip #3: Move on with life, and work on yourself as a person. This is key right here. You need to work on yourself, and become a stronger, better person. Don’t think of this as being something you’re doing to get back with your ex girlfriend. Think of it as something you’re doing for yourself. Girls love guys that are driven, motivated, and self-starters (don’t believe me? Look at who the hottest chicks are dating). Shit’s like catnip for chicks, for real.

Point being, no girl wants to go back to the same dude that eats nachos on the couch and plays Metal Gear Solid 2 all day. That’s why this breakup is a blessing in disguise. It can be the one thing that lights a fire under your ass to get your shit together. I know I’ve been emotionally crushed after breakups a bunch. And instead of letting them beat me up; I used that emotional void in my soul to drive me to success.

How to get back with your ex girlfriend tip #4: Don’t rely on her logic. NEVER try to convince girls or women on a logical basis. Why? Because emotions are EVERYTHING for women. If you want her back, you’ll have to get her emotions in the right spot. The best way to do this is not by being a passive-aggressive manipulative asshole. But rather, as I pointed above, by getting your shit together and letting her see that. That is when you contact her via facebook, text, phone, whatever, and get a chance at having her back. Only after you’ve done the above. This will maximize your chances of getting back together & maintaining a healthy relationship.

Which brings me to How to get back with your ex girlfriend conclusion. As you can see on the above, much of getting your ex back is out of your hands. The best strategy that has worked for me is:

1)      Show her that you can live without her. In fact, you improve yourself a lot after the separation.

2)      Make sure to do the above, and not EVER think of the breakup as, “I’m not good enough so I’ll work on myself”. That is the wrong thinking pattern to have. Think of it more along the lines of, “We’re broken up, ok. I think I’d enjoy life more if I dedicated myself to becoming a better man. Time to do that”. That is the most attractive thing you can do.

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First, I’d like to say that money and looks can help, but I’m broke, and I drive a beat up 95′ civic. Its irrelevant to success with women. Your vibe is the most important thing that you have. It is your #1 asset. I can BS you and tell you that I’m not insecure right now, but that’s simply not true. I still feel down sometimes, but it is usually when I’m inside the house or in front of the computer. When I head outside I get in a zone and any insecure thoughts vanish. This is attributed to getting WAY outside of my comfort zone on a regular basis. Getting WAY outside of your comfort zone is the first step to attracting a beautiful woman.

So heres the rundown of attracting hotties:

1.)  You must go out. If you are not going out nothing is gonna happen. Your success is directly correlated with how frequently you head out to an environment where you can meet and talk to women. What helped me a lot here was being socila with everyone: Women AND men. You gotta understand that its OK to introduce yourself to strangers and start a conversation. Simply say, “Hi, my name is ____”, shake hands, and start a conversation. The key is not to expect anything. Just let the conversation flow.

2.) An important thing that I’ve come to understand is that the people who surround you are just as intimidated and insecure as you are. A good way to look at their initial bitchy/aggressive reaction toward you is to recognize that “they may just be nervous, that if I quit the conversation now, is gonna be a lose situation for both, that I need to stick here to help them overcome their fears”.This is where talking to everyone helps. Getting in that social vibing zone is so helpful to attracting beautiful women.

3.)Always remember that if youre in a club, party, or bar, don’t for a second stop interacting with people. Always keep talking. That is the best way to get the ball rolling, and to keep you in a social mood. Thats the type of mood that has led me to attracting beautiful women the same night that I’d meet them. If you’re at a place with darts, a dancefloor, or a pool table, all the better. You can invite the people you meet there to play games/dance.

4.) Go into the place assuming everyone likes you, and they are your friend. Relax as you would with a close group of friends. Forget about trying to impress people. It is much more attractive to be relaxed and “with nothing to prove” in these situations.

5.) This one is a bit ballsy, but it is a huge component to attraction. You should always follow your gut about what you want. Think of what you want to happen in the interaction, and take the right action necessary to make it happen. If you want to talk to a certain girl, do it. If you want to hug her, hug her. Be in the moment (I’ve found that attracting beautiful women has become A LOT easier once I let my body do what it felt like doing). If you want to be alone with her, take her with you, if you want to reward a girl for something she said, do it, if you want to punish her for something she said, do it.

6.) Remember that whatever you’re doing, you’re doing for your self amusement. You have to feel, and believe that you’re your own party. Feel good, and feel great about yourself when you’re socially interacting with people.You are a fun dude, and you’re bringing the fun to the party. The group is not bringing this fun to you. Your fun depends on what you do, not on what the others are saying/doing. Your mindset should be that of, “The coolest thing going on is going on right here with ME”. Even if you’re having a simple conversation, that’s the coolest thing going on at that time. Girls find that extremely attracting. Being so in the zone is highly magnetic.

7.) Speak loud, laugh loud. These are alpha male attraction characteristics 101. Good voice volume draws attention to you right away. Also look into her eyes. Maintaining strong eye contact is important to create attraction, and create rapport with the girl.

8.) Escalate the interaction. Having the above mental attitude pointers to attracting beautiful women, you MUST escalate the interaction. This means initiating physical contact when you feel like you want to touch the girl (in a non-creepy way of course). Escalating is also done by giving her a wide range of emotions. Discussing stuff about sex is great for this:

Have you done a threesome?
Do you like doggy style?
Are you loud in bed?
Does your boyfriend likes to watch?
Have you kissed a girl?

You make the conversation sexual, you are not apologetic about what is it that you want to do or say. Don’t wait for her to show a sign of attraction before escalating. Theres a LOT of girls that are not secure about showing attraction toward a guy because they fear getting shut down. You should escalate regardless. Worst case scenario you two don’t click, and you’re off to find a girl who you can click with.

Return home from attract a beautiful woman guest post by MikeyP

As a moderator on the RSDNation forum, I am constantly deleting threads with some variation of “I know looks matter!”

Now, I think it could be a worthwhile debate, but history proves the opposite. It just turns into heated nonsense, and RSD Headquarters and the moderation team have decided that it is just better to delete any of the looks discussion threads before they inevitably get out of hand.

Now, since I have my own little platform here, I’ll give you my viewpoint. And there is nothing you can do about it. Hehe.

The big problem that guys have with this whole looks/money/success concept is that they aren’t even asking a proper question.

Do looks matter?

For WHAT?!

Do looks matter for kissing a girl? For taking a shit? For making it rain?

Ask a proper question and things change a bit.

The question that I think most guys want to know is:

Do looks and/or money matter for building female ATTRACTION?

Alright, that changes things a little bit.

And on the most fundamental level, on par with the Blueprint, the answer is

NO!!!!

But looks/money convey certain qualities about a guy that are attractive to a girl. And that, from a superficial level confuses guys.

How do looks and money come into play when building female attraction?

Well first we need to rehash what causes attraction.

VALUE!!!

Again, so the more high value you are, the more attractive you will be.

And again, women value things differently than men.

Men value how a girl looks, girls value ACTION! A MAN OF ACTION! ALPHA! LEADER! CONFIDENCE! DOMINANCE! GRAWRRR!!!

The high value guy is the one taking action, he is the natural leader, not afraid to make a mistake, not giving a fuck what others think of him and getting shit done.

So lets look a little more intensely into this man of action thingy.

How do looks and money convey that you are a man of action?

As much as a girl appreciates security, and a man who can provide for her, that is not the primary reason she may respond more positively to a guy that has money.

It is the fact that he is successful, that is why she is attracted to him. This presupposes that he is a man of action, in whatever arena of his life.

If he takes action in his career, he will probably be just as successful at being a husband, a father, a friend, whatever is necessary.

This applies to the looks debate as well. It is not so much that she sees you wearing a nice shirt and is like, “Oooh, he looks hot.” She sees that you can afford nice clothes, meaning you aren’t just sitting on your ass and cleaning up garbage for a living.

With that, another reason why looks can affect the female’s perspective of you is if you are overweight. If she only has your physical appearance to determine if you are a high value leader of men/man of action, who would look more like that guy? A fat guy, or a ripped dude with the six pack abs?

Well it’s pretty obvious that in this very superficial attribute, the ripped dude is taking action in the gym, and the fat dude is not. And hey, if that is all the girl initially has to work off of, of course it is going to be easier for the ripped dude to build that attraction with her

But guys see these sort of scenarios in the field and they use blanket statements like “Ripped dudes get all the girls! HAHA! I just know it!!”

And that just isn’t the case. I’ve literally proved it to myself by going out, not showering for 2-3 days and growing out my mustache to see if I can still have success pulling girls.

And I have.

I’ve been on program with Alex~ where he wore the same shirt 4 days in a row and was still pulling crazy ass even though he looked pretty haggard. ;)

You can EASILY overpower these hindrances, a guy that eats cheetos all day and watches t.v. can go out and pickup the hottest girl in the club.

But this leads to the discussion that Ryan talks about in one of his articles about cognitive dissonance.

Does it really make sense to be the guy that is lazy all day and then get out to the club and be all “Yeah dude, I’m a high value man of action! If a girl enters my life, she is WINNING!”?

If you are delusional, or just hit up the clubs enough you can overpower those internal self doubts, but don’t think they go away.

It really just doesn’t make sense. The whole reason why women are drawn to confidence is because in the caveman days it was a sign that you had something going on for you, there was something tangible to back it up.

Now we have realized, through all this nerd work and going out for countless hours that you don’t need to be a CEO with all the money in the world, or the good looking dude, but why stack the cards against yourself?

Build a well rounded life, work hard, play hard, hit the gym hard… They all go hand in hand towards being congruent with the whole confidence/self-esteem gig.

And take care of yourself when you hit the club. If you see me out in a club, I’m probably going to be wearing some rock star black shirt and a chunky watch of sorts.

Do I think it directly gets me girls? No. But it does convey that I take care of myself, that I am not just some slob who throws on whatever. And it shows that I can afford a cool watch or something, which shows I probably am doing well in my career too. It’s also good for the little self-esteem boost that Tyler talks about in the Blueprint, you just feel damn good wearing some new sweet gear.

But I know that is for myself, not for the girl.

I agree with this for the most part. It definitely applies 100% if you’re at a stage of your life where you’re dating, and not necessarily “looking for someone to marry”. Many women that I’ve talked to will look at a dudes financial stability before they marry him no matter how good his game is. But if you’re just going out to clubs to get laid the above article is applicable 100% WOO!

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First date tips for men: Date mindset. Don’t concentrate on getting laid. Have the mindset of a guy that gets sex regularly, and doesn’t have to work for it very hard. Women can sense your desperation, and will find it extremely unattractive. Try to stay relax and vibe with her. Talk about general topics while you maintain strong eye contact, and confident body language. A great book that mantions all of the body language essentials and teaches you to become an alpha male is Become an Alpha Male by John Alexander.

First date tips for men: Where to take her. Instead of the above expensive date, take her to somewhere completely informal. A coffee shop or a cheap diner place for lunch is good. Don’t make a big deal out of who pays for what. In fact, if you’re shown some alpha male characteristics before, she will often gladly oblige to pay. The last 3-4 girls that I’ve gone on dates with have paid for themselves, or offered to pay for me. This is because it makes them feel more comfortable. When they pay they don’t feel obligated to put out. This takes away the casual relaxed setting that works best.

Coffee shops are great because they are public (she feels safe), highly informal (no strings attached), and only cost a couple of bucks. Another good venue choice is a place that has a bar in the restaurant. This offers you the opportunity to get drinks after dinner. It will look really natural as well. Remember, alcohol lets us do what we want to do in the first place (but are scared of the social repercussions).

I usually have one coffee shop that I frequent. It is located close to my house so that I can take her from the coffee shop to my house easily. I always tip the workers well, and make small talk with them. That way, whenever I bring a new girl over, she sees that I have a high social status and that people like me. This perceived status is really important to women, and it will help your game LOTS.

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It takes big cojones to do this sort of thing. However, the rewards for those that rise up are amazing.
A few examples from my personal life. When I’m in practice for wrestling, or thai boxing, I’ll often ask to spar with a person who is bigger or more experienced than me. This is counter intuitive, and as soon as I see someone who would be a tough match up I get a tense feeling in my gut, then my brain starts questioning if that’s a good course of action. The way to override these feelings is to act quickly. So I’d ask the 220 pound dude with a shaved head to spar before my brain would have time to figure out the implications. That way the logical side of my brain can’t psyche me out of doing what I need is necessary in order to get better.

I’ve gotten my ass kicked a bunch of times by doing this. This may seem like a bad thing, but there’s a silver lining here as well. I was surprised to find that more often than not I did really well, and even exceeded my own expectations, as well as the expectations of others. Had I just stayed content sparring with mediocre people I would’ve stayed comfortable winning, but I would have not learned at a much quicker pace. The mentality of a person that is willing to look bad in order to challenge themselves is crucial in any area of achievement.

Another personal life example is working in the server industry for over 2 years. Though I didn’t like all of it, having to talk to hundreds of people who you don’t know helps a great deal in overcoming fear of social interactions. Being a server also helped me learn work under pressure. Both things were greatly outside of my comfort zone when I started, but I grew tremendously because of trying them out. Getting that type of job isn’t the “be all solution to socializing” that a lot of people make it out to be, but it certainly helps get more social if that is something you desire.

Same thing applies to girls. When you get out of your comfort zone by talking to a hot blond chick, you’re putting a lot of yourself on the line. There’s a chance that you will get shut down, but if you succeed the rewards will be huge. Plus, you really cant fail because you’re learning during this process. So “failure” can be replaced with “learning” here. That’s a key frame of mind to have. Any experience in life that would be deemed as a failure by the masses is actually just another learning experience. Don’t take those small bumps along the journey seriously. They are just there to test how badly you want to achieve your goals. Do you want to achieve them badly enough to go ahead and overcome fear on the most fundamental level?

John Alexander describes this well in Becoming an Alpha Male. One of the primary characteristics of an alpha male is a strong belief in himself. Alpha males act on their fears even if they know there’s a good chance that the will fail. His book has a bunch of awesome exercises and theory that has really helped to get this point illustrated. I really recommend that you read the review here, or grab a copy of the book here.

Here’s a useful exercise that a mentor of mine taught me: Take a pen and paper right NOW, and write a few times in the last couple of days where you had the opportunity to get outside of your comfort zone. Did you do what you knew was the right choice despite some fears that you had? If not, make a challenge to act despite your fears at least once per day for the next 30 days. That’s something you can do every day to grow tremendously as an individual. Now to make it a bit easier, you don’t have to expand your comfort zone in every situation that presents itself, but make sure to do it at least once per day.

This challenge won’t be easy, but with time you’ll get into the habit of jumping at those “comfort zone expanding” opportunities. It will literally become part of your character to jump at these opportunities.

I was dozing off on the subway today going to a practice. In my peripheral vision I saw a girl get up from her seat, and walk over to sit down closer to me. I knew logically that’s as little of a sign as I need to approach her. Since I wasn’t all dressed up, and had just been napping in my seat I felt a slight anxiety about talking to her. As soon as that anxiety came up though I knew it was time to ACT. Overcoming my fear was the necessary thing to do, so I started a conversation, and had the girl laughing within a minute. This is despite the fact that I was dressed in track pants, and a big ass snowman jacket. Not to mention I didn’t shave that day, and had some eye boogers from my awesome nap. A simple interaction like that is the difference between you meeting up with a new cutie the following Friday night, or wondering the dreaded, “what could have been”.

You don’t notice how much growth little moments like that foster in you. But doing these little things on a daily basis goes a long way in a year’s time.

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Psychologically speaking, the eye has always been more than just an organ that detects light and sends a signal along the optic nerve to the brain. The bible mentions that, “The eyes are likened to the windows of the heart” (Mark 7:20-23). And lots of faux-pas cold-reader psychics will charge you upwards of hundreds of dollars an hour per palm reading to tell you that the eyes are truly a window to the soul. We try to stay away from that stuff here at Best Dating Manual. So instead let’s concentrate on getting laid …and goals, positivity, and reaching your potential, but what’s that got to do with hot girls anyway ;)?

So what does that have to do with how to tongue kiss?

It is much harder to do if she is looking at you. Eye contact plays a huge role in sub-communicating dominance. Plus your brain keeps freaking out when you’re leaning in saying stuff like, “oh no, she can see me, what if she pulls away, OMG OMG OMG”. That’s why a lot of times a guy will be in the following situation:

You’re both sober, chilling on a couch, there’s awesome physical contact, she’s playing with her hair, the light is dimmed. I.E. all you need to do is go for it. You escalate physically little by little. But you simply don’t know how to tongue kiss her. This is something that an alpha male wouldn’t have an issue with. And John Alexander explains this perfectly in Become an Alpha Male.

If you’ve ever been in the above scenario, here is another way go for the kiss: After there’s lots of physical contact going on, tell the girl to close her eyes. Then gently put your hand on the side of her cheek (this is not mandatory), and as you’re doing that, go in for the kiss. Smooth as butter my friends.

The above works REALLY well. Here are some actual tips of how to tongue kiss well:

1.) Don’t be too aggressive, but rather take it slow and relaxed. Make it an intimate kissing experience for both of you.

2.) Put you hand on the side of her cheek, or gently caress/pull her hair. Make sure your hands are touching her instead of having them at your sides.

3.) Close your eyes. Girls like that more, and it looks king of creepy if both of you have your eyes open.

4.) Pull away from the kiss first. This is really important, and it will keep the sexual tension up because she will want more kisses from you.

I used this for the first time last year. I had a miserable dry spell going on, met up with this girl, was over at her place cuddling, and couldn’t find the courage to just go for it (probably due to not hooking up with anyone for a while). Anyway, this closing the eyes bit worked awesome in that situation.

This method is nice, but don’t rely on it all the time. Experiment, and get to a point where you can just go for it. Being able to go for the make out “balls-out-style” will pay huge dividends in your confidence. You’ll find that it also improves other areas of your game as well. On a very fundamental level, being the type of man that goes for what he wants no matter what the situation is very attractive. What I’m trying to say is use this technique sparingly, and try to get yourself toward a “go for broke” attitude.

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Here is a step by step guide for dating help for men:

1.) You need to commit yourself to becoming better at dating long term. If this goal is the most important thing in your life right now, you need to “sign a contract” with yourself that you will not quit trying to improve this area of your life for the next 18 months. You’ll have some heartbreaking moments along the way, and I need you to commit to persevere now, rather than trying to do that during the heartbreaking moments.

2.) Write your ultimate goal on a piece of paper. Put it beside your bed so that you see it before you go to sleep, and when you wake up in the morning. This could be to get a girlfriend; it could be to have sex with a new girl every week, etc. When you read that goal over, VISUALIZE what it would be like to achieve that goal. Make the visualization as real and vivid as possible.

3.) Read some dating help for men material. Don’t get too caught up in learning everything out there though, a book or two should be more than enough to get you started. In dating, the most important thing is action, not reading a ton of material that will make you an expert. I highly recommend Become An Alpha Male. That book is great at presenting all of the main concepts, as well as intricate principles to get your dating life in order. Read that book, and use it as a reference point. Make sure to apply the things that are taught in it. That bears repeating twice: Make sure to APPLY the things taught in the book. Simply reading it will not help you date beautiful women. Applying the concepts, and seeing what works for you on a long term basis is what WILL help you date beautiful women.

4.) Now, decide on a daily activity that would help get you closer to that goal. For me it was talking to 5 new girls every day. I did that for the first month or so until I started to get a bunch of phone numbers from the girls I was approaching. Write your to-do list for these daily activities before you go to bed. Look at it in the morning, and carry it with you throughout the day.

Some ideas for the daily “dating help for men” daily activities:

-talking to 5 new girls every day

-calling 5 girls every day

-trying to set up a date with 5 girls every day

5.) Get an excel spreadsheet to keep track of all your numbers. Make sure you are always doing the daily goals. They will determine how QUICKLY you will achieve the main goal that you desire. The excel spreadsheet also allows you to see any patterns that are developing. For example, you may notice that after the first 2 months you’re getting 2 phone numbers for every 10 approaches. A month later you might average out 3 phone numbers for 10 approaches. That’s a great way to gauge your progress.

6.) Commit to the above dating help for men steps no matter how hard it gets. You already signed a contract with yourself for 18 months. Persevere no matter how heartbreaking things get. During that time you are guaranteed to have 6-9 “crisis” points where you want to give up. Between those “crisis” points you will have lots of setbacks, and problems. Continue regardless, and you will succeed. I guarantee that.

This is a method that I’ve recommended to many people who are now seeing AMAZING results. I’m sure you can replicate their success if you follow through with all the steps outlined in this Dating Help for Men article.

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This clubbing guide is what I use whenever I go out with the goal to come home with a new girl. Following these steps maximizes my chances of pulling a girl home, and it ensures that I’m having a blast:

• Clubbing Guide Step 1: Social mood right off the bat, even before heading out.

It’s important to get talkative an hour before going clubbing. When I go downtown on the subway, my friends and I always practice projecting our voices by talking loud, making jokes, and getting in a good mood. If there are any girls around, this is the perfect time to approach them. The most important clubbing guide pointer is to get social as soon as possible,and to stay social through out the night. If there is a cute girl sitting in front of you and your friend one of you has to talk to her. Say, “Hi” at the very least. This clubbing guide step is the most important one to follow.

Keep up this social vibe on the way to the club, in the line-up, with the coat check people, bouncers, etc. It makes it much easier to keep up the talking once you’re inside. And we all know that talking is the first step to sex. Plus this keeps you from getting inside of your head.

• Clubbing Guide Step 2: Go talk to girls that you think are “out of your league”.

This is huge among the male population. The “out of your league” term shouldn’t even exist for you. If you want to get laid with hotties, your mind has to be set right from the start. Its like any type of competition, you have to be mentally ready to win before you can actually win. Whenever limiting beliefs enter your mind, take a deep breath and let those limiting beliefs drift away. You should believe that you can go out with any girl in the club because she would benefit from knowing such a high value guy.

• Clubbing Guide Step 3: Stay in uncomfortable situations for a little bit longer.

This is where growth happens. A lot of times it’ll social interactions will get awkward, and you’ll want to leave the girl you’re talking to. Don’t do it. You’re blowing a perfectly good chance to have a great learning experience. There’s obviously a time where you burn your bridges with her and nothing good will come from further interaction. However, sometimes her unresponsive exterior is just a big test. The only way to find out is to stick in there for an extra 1-2 minutes.

• Clubbing Guide Step 4: Stop caring what the spectators think, they don’t matter.

This is your show. When I go to the club it’s the Vlad show, and I’m there to shine. Everyone’s invited to partake in the great time I’m having. Spectators that are standing on the sidelines sipping on their drinks in the shadows don’t matter. If I approach a group of girls, and they tell me to fuck off, I could care less about the critics that laugh while standing on the sidelines sipping their drinks.

• -Clubbing Guide Step 5: Go with friends that can be themselves.

Avoid going with people that are going to be judgmental, or general party poopers. When I go clubbing with my friends we do all sorts of stupid, funny stuff. Its fun, and we don’t take each other seriously. I have been out with some guys who would be so into their shell that they’d constantly try to look cool out there. Little did they realize that that made them spectators, not the “star attraction”. To have a great time regardless of the results you need to set yourself free from the expectations of others. Go with good friends that are not afraid to approach, and have fun.

• Clubbing Guide Step 6: Alcohol is optional, but is definitely not necessary.

I went clubbing A LOT last summer. My main goal was to have 2 new dates every week.  The cover costs for the clubs would pile up quick by themselves… imagine that plus alcohol! On a starving college student’s budget, that lifestyle would be next to impossible to sustain. I pre-drank a few times, but that got expensive too, so I went 100% sober to clubs.

This is a crazy concept for most people to grasp, but you don’t need alcohol to be yourself. Focus on making the night your show, and things will flow naturally with or without booze. Most people feel much better when they have a few drinks to loosen up. Thats OK, but don’t become dependent on it, and don’t over do it. I’ve messed up plenty of opportunities to get laid by saying the funny one-liner instead of smooth talking my way to to the bedroom.

• Clubbing Guide Step 7: Smell good, and dress clean clothes.

This should be obvious, but there’s dudes that don’t do it, and are wondering why they’re not getting laid. Make sure you always have some gum/condoms as well.

There you have it, the top clubbing guide steps for ensuring that you`ll have as much fun as possible, while having the greatest chances of hook up success.

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These guy dating tips are the result of me calling women for dates thousands of times. Today, many people have difficulty with talking on the phone with someone they are not familiar with. This isn’t a problem that only afflicts a younger, more internet dependent demographic. I’ve talked to plenty adults who get nervous about talking to women, or business prospects on the phone. With the increase in internet communication, being good on the phone can be one way to set you apart from all the other guys that email/IM/text her.
The most important thing with phone game is having the cojones to do it. So I usually will call a girl right when I’m nervous about doing it. That nervousness is a good feeling because it means you’re about to act despite your fears. Here are 7 guy dating tips for calling girls:

1.) Prepare: Begin by jotting down a few interesting things that happened to you in the past few days. Don’t write elaborate paragraphs, but a few words about topics of conversation. For example, today I went out and got some kick ass fruit salad, watched slumdog millionaire, and I just finished up a hard workout at home. These can be my 3 “go to” topics in case the conversation starts to die out. Elaborating on each one of those topics, and making a couple of jokes can lead to a several of minutes of conversation.

2.) Crack a few jokes: This guy dating tip is key. Guys that are naturals with women have a good sense of humour, and joke around a lot. The best way to do this is to bust on her a little bit for something that she did. You’re not making fun of her as much as you are teasing her. This is really important on the phone and in your daily interactions as well. This type of teasing peaks their interest toward you (if you’re face to face, you’ll know you’re teasing her right if she starts hitting you lightly, pushing you away playfully, or laughing about whatever it is you’re saying).

3.) Lead: As with most things that are related to guy dating tips, you need to lead. Lead the conversation where you want it to go. This doesn’t mean to be talking most of the time, but know that when she is talking about something it is because you’re down with that topic. If she starts discussing something you’re not OK with, change the conversation to something that you want to talk about. The leading aspect is very important to your dating life in general. One of the books that illustrates this perfectly is “Become An Alpha Male”. Read my review by clicking here.

4.) Tonality: Hum before calling her. Basically make the type of “ohmm” sounds that people do when they’re meditating for yoga. When you’re humming, take your voice to high levels, and to low levels to get a good range going. Right before dialing the number hum in a low baritone for about 5-7 seconds. Apart from subtle relaxation reasons, this helps your voice have more resonance, make it deeper, and more dominant. This is a subtle guy dating tip that is often overlooked, but I’ve found it to be pretty useful.
5.) Call her by her name: Don’t go crazy with this one, but using her name a bunch is good for creating comfort, and building rapport.

6.) Availability: Similar to when you’re kissing her, be the first person to say bye.  This shows that you’re a busy dude that has a bunch of stuff going on in your life. You took some valuable time out of your schedule to talk to her, and she should be appreciative towards that. You’re not a needy friend that has all the time in the world to talk to her. This also provides dominance (you’re in control).

7.) Stay comfortable: You need to sound like you’re in the zone. This is best accomplished by sitting down in a comfortable position where you are relaxed.
So there you have it, Vlad’s 7 guy dating tips for calling women on the phone. I’d like to mention that experimenting, and finding out what works for you can be just as beneficial as using the above guidelines.

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Unless you were born a Casanova, you need to know how to properly avoid the dreadful friend zone. This is that dreadful territory of your relationship with a girl that is neither here nor there; It seems like you’re spending lots of time together, and you have a deeper connection. However, you are not doing anything sexual with the girl, despite the fact that she tells you how much better you are than “those dirt bags that [I] keep hooking up with”. Don’t get me wrong, there are a few girls that have been my friends, but that is because I saw a lot of value in the relationship, and I wasn’t merely trying to progress from being a friend to hooking up with them. Here are 5 steps that I’ve taken in order to stop getting friend zoned by women:

1.) Avoid friend zone via Alpha Male Mindset: You need to have the core beliefs of a man who is not afraid to show his intent. If you like the girl, you will show your feelings by having physical contact with her, by flirting with her, and by asking her out. Often times the guy friends in her life don’t act on their core emotions, and prefer to stay idling nearby. They’re waiting for the perfect timing that is just not going to be there. Maintaining this mindset is important both before you hook up with her and after.

2.) You are not an emotional punching bag: There is a fine line between her telling you a story, or bitching at you about how much of an asshole that guy from work is. I have dated a few girls that have had, “guy friends” who they’d use like emotional punching bags. Whenever something would go wrong these girls would complain to those guys about, “how unfair life is”. If you haven’t hooked up with the girl yet, I’d recommend avoiding these topics completely. Your mentality should be that of a guy that cares, but that will only be used as a shoulder to cry on under dire circumstances. After you have sex this step is less necessary, but remember that you are not in the relationship in order for her to relieve her emotions on you on a daily basis.

3.) Don’t talk to her about past boyfriends/fuck buddies before you hook up with her. If you talk to her about her past hookups, this can get dreadfully close to being the friend she complains to about her emotional baggage. Once you get in the habit of meeting lots of women you will understand how to direct the conversation about past boyfriends, etc. in a way that doesn’t reduce your chances of hooking up.

4.) Avoid friend zone by NOT adding her on facebook before you’re having regular sex. I’d even avoid adding her after you get intimate (I communicate on the phone 90% of the time with the girls I’m seeing now, and haven’t added any of them on facebook). Phone is ideal, msn is ok, and email is to be avoided (from my experience). Facebook is filled with guys that have weak game who are in her friend zone. Stand out from the rest of the “weak game pack” by communicating through the above mentioned ways instead. There’s several other detrimental things about facebook that I will touch up on at a later date.

5.) Don’t put the girl on a pedestal. No matter how hot, or special, or charismatic, or whatever this girl is, she’s still just a girl, and there’s a lot more girls out there that you can hook up with. All of the friendzone relationships that I’ve ever heard of have been caused in part by treating the girl like a delicate flower that deserves more attention and nurture than the guy. This is a surefire way to cause a tangible (for the girl) imbalance in the way the relationship works. It also prevents you from being as spontaneous, or dominant as you should be for the girl to want you.

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